I find that when I think of some of the big things I’m up to lately, I have a tendency to stop myself because I don’t know how I’ll do them. For example, I want to change the lives of 100,000 women by coaching and empowering them to be awesome badasses. That’s a pretty rad goal, and it feels like a huge number to me. As soon as I start really giving it some thought, my gut reaction is to talk myself out of it because I don’t know how I’d ever reach an audience of that size.
In the past, if I didn’t know how I would do something, I’d pick something smaller and safer instead.
My clients encounter the same thing, they want to have more balance in their lives, take better care of themselves, make a huge change in their work or relationships, but stop because of the how. Our first question is often, “Sure, but how?” Are you guilty of this too?
I say, let’s slow our roll on figuring out the how.
When we practice this, there are a few immediate benefits. First, we can get really in touch with what it’s all for. Is this really something that we’re committed to doing? Because if not, then let’s stop right here. If it is something we’re committed to, then there won’t be just one way to get it done, there are many “hows”. When we’re fully committed, we’ll try and try and fail and try again.
Secondly, by slowing down, we can take a minute to play with the goal. I recently heard a coach describe her goals as “impossible”. She really loves setting huge goals for herself and calling them impossible. Doing so allows her to stop focusing on the immediate “how”. Instead she plays with what it would be like to do the impossible, and all of the fun ways that she could work towards it. It empowers her to be creative and really dig into the goal without be pressuring herself to know what’s next.
I love looking at my goals this way because I can give myself permission to set really big goals I wouldn’t have dreamed of otherwise. I don’t have a need to figure it all out right away. And I can get in touch with all of the ways I can impact the world. It feels incredibly empowering and when I do reach one of these massive goals, then holy shit! I just did something impossible. That’s pretty cool, let’s do it again.
What benefit do you see for yourself by taking a break from figuring it all out right away? Do any new (or even old goals that you’ve shelved) come to mind as something that you’d still like to do?